We are of the species Gallus gallus domesticus and we enjoy to regularly consume Gallus gallus domesticus. That's right, we are chicken cannibals. Even more importantly, we believe in the death, resurrection, and eventual return of Jesus Christ. That's right, we are Christian chicken cannibals. Now more pertinently, we are students at Bethel University in St. Paul, MN. That's right, we are Christian collegiate chicken cannibals. Try saying that five times fast.
We are the Bethel Chickens. We are siblings. We don't have individual names, nor do we concern ourselves with any form of individual identity (if it is more convenient, you may call us Chicken #1 and Chicken #2). The only difference between us is that one is majoring in environmental science and the other in journalism (with a minor in engineering).
From a young age, Chicken #1 felt a deep calling to care for the planet. God calls us to care for the earth in Genesis 2:15 and for our neighbor in Mark 12:31 ("love your neighbor as yourself"). In chickhood, Chicken #1 observed the devastation that erosion, pollution, and deforestation caused around his home farm. Erosion caused the ground to crack and become non-arable. Fertilizer leaked into rivers and poisoned the local water supply. Deforestation robbed close animal brethren of their home. He felt a spiritual calling rise in his chicken soul (now that's chicken soup for the soul).
Chicken #2 experienced a life-altering event as a chick. One day at the farm, young Chicken #2 heard news of a homicide in the next town over. Distraught, he searched for answers among his peers and seniors as to why someone got away with such a thing. No one had an adequate answer. From that day forward, Chicken #2 dedicated his life to the prevention of future crimes by designing security measures and reporting any suspicious activity to the local police and press. Because news of the homicide spread, the police were able to capture a suspect, put on a trial, and convict the person of murder in the first degree. Chicken #2 knew his passion. He would study the most effective way to communicate information to the masses while also designing any sort of device or system to prevent further harm from being done, not just on a rural Minnesotan farm, but at a macro scale.
Our family was pleased with our chickhood aspirations. However, when we began to display an affinity for the fatty and undesirable chicken meat scraps that the farmers would occasionally toss into the pen, we were slowly ostracized. At first, mother hen passed our behavior off as a phase; temporary but magnified by playing off of the other's eccentricity. As the months brought the dawn of adolescence, we became rooted in our belief that the consumption of chicken meat was acceptable, albeit unconventional. After all, it's not like we're humans. At first, we were just strongly encouraged to move out of the pen. Eventually, our mother gave us an ultimatum: leave or the family would exclude us from family feedings, flocks, and reunions. We knew that the only way we could achieve our dreams were to attend university. Because of family pressures and occupational aspirations, we chose to move out of the pen and into the bustling city of St. Paul, MN - more specifically, Bethel University.
We are now sophomores at Bethel, choosing now to expose our identity as we wanted to acclimate ourselves to the environment before diving headfirst into the public eye. Now here we are, collegiate cannibals, brothers by blood and in Christ, striving to serve the community and the environment in any way possible. We hope that our testimony inspired you in some way. We're glad you're a part of our journey.
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